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CNBC Blogs Funny Business with Jane Wells


  Thursday, 9 Aug 2007 | 2:24 PM ET

A Foot Fetish Pay Off: But Fake Jane "Flip Flops"

Posted By: Jane Wells
Eric Distenfeld likes to watch people's feet. It pays off. Last week I told you that Distenfeld, a portfolio manager at Chestnut Ridge Capital, noticed a lot more people wearing Crocs to temple on Tisha B'av, a day in the Jewish tradition when you're not supposed to wear leather shoes. Distenfeld says he then bought a bunch of CROX shares heading into earnings. Earnings were stellar, and he made a killing. Now he's watching people's feet again... »Read more
  Wednesday, 8 Aug 2007 | 3:57 PM ET

The Pit Bull, The Farmer And Me

Posted By: Jane Wells
I am currently sitting in a McDonald's in Chino, California, where it's about 152 degrees outside. I've been in a corn field all day doing live shots on how companies like Monsanto are investing big money to genetically modify crops so they can withstand drought. Chino is best known for its dairy farms...and, well, you really can't appreciate the smell of the place until you've been here. The flies are so numerous they have their own Congressional district. »Read more
  Wednesday, 8 Aug 2007 | 10:13 AM ET

Richard Branson: Fake Jane/Real Jane Thinks He's Awesome

Posted By: Jane Wells
Who doesn’t want to be Sir Richard Branson? Today, though, he may have bitten of more than his beknighted mouth can chew. I wish him well in starting a new airline based in San Francisco, Virgin America. He will need luck. Folks, if you’ve ever flown in or out of San Francisco, you know what I'm talking about—the bitter resentment growing in your belly as the fog settles in once more and delays your flight for two hours. »Read more
  Tuesday, 7 Aug 2007 | 4:44 PM ET

Fake Steve Outed, Now Fake Jane: The Real Fake Jane Is...

Posted By: Jane Wells
"Fake Jane," the wildly popular alter-evil-ego of Real Jane, has been the talk of the blogosphere. Haven't you heard? Ok, take my word for it, then. Fake Jane "tells it like it is." She has opined on a variety of important issues of the day, like the distastrous impact HD cameras will have on her career. Fake Jane has railed against the hiring of young women in TV news--any woman younger than she is. Which is a lot of women. »Read more
  Thursday, 2 Aug 2007 | 9:51 AM ET

Croc Shoes Follow Up: Religious "Sole" For Wear?

Posted By: Jane Wells
In an earlier post, I mentioned how one Pittsburgh hospital is banning its staff from wearing Crocs shoes. Well, it appears Crocs are just what the doctor ordered for some members of the Jewish faith. Here's how. Last week was Tisha B'av, considered "the saddest day in Jewish history," marking several awful events that happened on that day over the centuries, including the destruction of Temple in Jerusalem not once, but twice--more than 600 years apart. »Read more
  Wednesday, 1 Aug 2007 | 11:22 AM ET

A Whole Lot of Croc

Posted By: Jane Wells
A hospital in Pittsburgh is banning Crocs, the comfy rubbery shoes with holes in them. Hospital officials call them a hazard, fearing a nurse might drop a syringe on his or her foot and, bingo! One nurse tells the AP that's a croc. "I mean, I can get a needle stuck in my arm or my leg." »Read more
  Tuesday, 31 Jul 2007 | 12:06 PM ET

Star Jones Admits To Bypass Surgery: I Think We Knew That

Posted By: Jane Wells
So Star Jones finally admits she had gastric bypass surgery. Really? People, it's like denying you had a facelift, collagen, or breast augmentation. WE KNOW. 177,000 people had gastric bypass last year, nearly double from 2003, making it one of the fastest growing plastic surgery procedures. So is PhotoShop. Check out Kelly Osbourne--I'll have what she's having. »Read more
  Monday, 30 Jul 2007 | 12:47 PM ET

Rolls Royce Phantom Coupe: I Was Born To Drive It (Sort Of)

Posted By: Jane Wells
This job really does beat working for a living. I've just had the opportunity to drive a car worth, gulp, $435,000. That's about twice the price of your average home in the U.S. these days. The car is a new Rolls Royce Phantom Drophead Coupe (pronounced coup-AY). Drophead is a fancy name for convertible. The car will start selling in September, and the first year is pretty much sold out. Yeah. Sold out. »Read more
  Thursday, 26 Jul 2007 | 4:15 PM ET

Honda Surf Festival: Cow-a Bunga Dude (Or Steers Hang Ten)

Posted By: Jane Wells
Most mind-numbing PR stunt of the summer (so far): Here's the headline: "100 cows face-off against world-class surfers during Honda U.S. Open of Surfing at the Huntington Beach Pier." Where's the beef? Against the backdrop of the world's largest professional surfing competition, 100 cows will be herded into the Honda U.S. Open of Surfing by 40 cowboys on Thursday, July 26. The first-ever beach cattle drive at the Huntington Beach Pier takes place at 7:00 a.m., even as professional surfing's "elite athletes take to the waves." »Read more
  Thursday, 26 Jul 2007 | 8:20 AM ET

Lindsay Lohan: The "Real" Business Angle For CNBC

Posted By: Jane Wells
Note to PR people: please actually WATCH our network and understand what CNBC does before sending pitches. Here's a shortened list of press releases sent my way in the last 24 hours: "Draumr Publishing, an independent U.S. press, has finally released 'Moon Child,' the tantalizing new novel by first time Canadian author Simone Maroney, to the North American public. The book is a rollicking good ride, complete with adventure, betrayal and harrowing escapes from dire circumstances." And then there's Lindsay Lohan. »Read more

About Funny Business with Jane Wells

  • If it was up to Jane Wells, she’d spend her entire day combing Mother Earth for stories and observations just for this blog. She has more fun writing Funny Business than anything else she does... professionally, that is. Funny business is whatever Jane considers hilarious, strange, fishy, or ridiculous, which pretty much covers everything on Wall Street. It is her hope this blog makes you smile, even when the news is grim. After all, it's only money.


  • Jane Wells

    Based in Los Angeles, Jane Wells is a CNBC business news reporter and also writes the Funny Business blog for CNBC.com.