Schmuck Insurance—So Easy Two Billionaires Can Do It

Friday, 25 Jan 2013 | 5:36 PM ET
Bill Ackman and Carl Icahn
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Bill Ackman and Carl Icahn

One of the most amusing comments to come out of the entire Bill Ackman-Carl Icahn spat was the revelation that the two agreed to "schmuck insurance."

(Read More: Icahn, Ackman in Epic Showdown of Billionaires.)

Ackman wrote in a press release:

"On March 1, 2003, on behalf of my former fund, Gotham Partners, I entered into a contract with Carl Icahn, signed by him, to sell him a 15% stake in Hallwood Realty Partners. He paid my investors $80 per share and agreed to what he called 'schmuck insurance.' The agreement provided that he would pay my investors an earnout equal to 50% of his profit on Hallwood after he received a 10% annual return if he 'sold or otherwise transferred' his shares for value within three years."

Ackman says Icahn reneged, proving the insurance really was for schmucks.

(Read More: Ackman, Icahn Showdown: Twitter Reaction.)

So I'm thinking of starting a company called Schmuck Insurance. If these two need it, we all need it. My suggested tagline, "Schmuck Insurance. All you need is a handshake."


Other suggested taglines from Twitter include:

"Schmuck Insurance: don't get caught short."

"So easy two billionaire cavemen can do it."

"Schmuck Insurance: we won't bully you."

"When you're tired of the Duck, try the Schmuck."

"We putz the client first."

Thanks for the suggestions from @tomkorocz, @j2lovesfriday, @WillowGroveJoe, and @szorowitz. Add yours in the comments section below.

—By CNBC's Jane Wells; Follow her on Twitter: @janewells


  • Based in Los Angeles, Jane Wells is a CNBC business news reporter and also writes the Funny Business blog for CNBC.com.