Funny Business with Jane Wells


  Monday, 27 Aug 2007 | 12:19 PM ET

'Imagine' No Subprime: The World Will Live As One?

Posted By: Jane Wells
Today I'm uncovering the truth about home prices. Yes, the truth! We went to an auction this weekend in Ontario, California, where a NEW Beazer home was on the foreclosure block (I guess the original buyer's lending fell through). In a neighborhood where other new, or nearly new, homes are on sale for $420k, this home's opening bid was...$209,000. »Read more
  Friday, 24 Aug 2007 | 12:09 PM ET

Real Estate Crisis? Doesn't Matter (Too Much) In Vail

Posted By: Jane Wells
I'm in Vail, Colorado, which is in the midst of a massive, $2 billion make-over to try to make it a year-round destination. Cranes and construction are everywhere. Aspen seems to get most of the summer tourist business, and Vail wants a piece of it. The two towns have about as much affection for each other as the Crips and Bloods. »Read more
  Wednesday, 22 Aug 2007 | 10:47 AM ET

Florence Henderson Back in Oil Business (Canola That Is)

Posted By: Jane Wells
Wesson Oil has re-hired Florence Henderson as spokeswoman. The company is supposed to post some of her old commercials on their ConAgra Web site, but I couldn’t find them. What I did find is Henderson’s “tips for cooking with canola oil” (yes, I truly believe these tips came straight from Flo’s kitchen and were not made up by marketing people… no, really, I believe that): »Read more
  Wednesday, 22 Aug 2007 | 8:34 AM ET

Best Restroom  Of The Year Or Just Some Toilet Humor?

Posted By: Jane Wells
Here's an award worth winning! Cintas, which provides bathroom supplies, announced the winner of this year’s “best restroom” contest. The award goes to Jungle Jim’s International Market, a grocery store outside Cincinnati. Get this. The bathroom entrances appear to be portable toilets. But once inside, they all lead to a jungle themed restroom with flowers... »Read more
  Tuesday, 21 Aug 2007 | 1:56 PM ET

My Perfect Screen Saver? And Everyone Sing Fake Jane!

Posted By: Jane Wells
First off, check out this freeze frame of me and the banner underneath. One person has threatened to make this his screen saver! FAKE JANE'S SONG PARODY: to the chorus of "Where Have All the Flowers Gone." »Read more
  Tuesday, 21 Aug 2007 | 11:31 AM ET

Mortgage Crunch Blues: More Song Parodies To Sing By

Posted By: Jane Wells
Here are more song parodies (see my previous post) to try to bring a smile to those of you upside down in your mortgage (or upside down in your Capital One and Countrywide stock): From a Colorado mortgage company grunt, the appropriately named Rocky M (talk about smiling through the pain), called 'Green Tree Beret" and sung to the "Green Beret" theme: »Read more
  Monday, 20 Aug 2007 | 3:34 PM ET

Elton John, The Eagles Respond To Countrywide Crisis

Posted By: Jane Wells
So is my headline true? Not really. But bloggers out there are having a field day with the Countrywide situation, capturing the mortgage mayhem in ways more creative than any no-doc, no money down, 120% Alt-A pay-option mortgage. From paper-money.blogspot.com, come the following song parodies from "Anonymous" (I promise it's not me. I'm not that clever. Not even Fake Jane is that clever. »Read more
  Monday, 20 Aug 2007 | 2:05 PM ET

Countrywide Talks (Employees) And Fake Jane Responds

Posted By: Jane Wells
So I'm sitting in the bagel shop on Saturday morning having my usual breakfast and coffee, when a woman approaches me with a sunny smile and says, "I work at Countrywide and we watch you all the time!" I grimaced, thinking she must hate me. Instead, she said, "Are you OK?" I said, "Yes I'm fine, but, more importantly, how are you?" "Great!" She proceeded to tell me that everyone on the inside knows Countrywide is going to be fine... »Read more
  Friday, 17 Aug 2007 | 11:49 AM ET

You Laugh Because It Hurts Too Much to Cry Pt. 2

Posted By: Jane Wells
The folks who run a song parody site called VERSUS have sent me their "song of the week." If this doesn't make you smile through the pain, well, pour yourself another scotch and then listen. »Read more
  Friday, 17 Aug 2007 | 11:35 AM ET

Angelo Mozilo Unplugged

Posted By: Jane Wells
The Countrywide Investor Relations site is promoting its 2007 Investor Forum. It takes place Sept. 5-6 and includes a "Servicing Tour"at the company's offices in Simi Valley, followed by a day-long panel discussion and Q&A at headquarters in Calabasas. Discussions include a "Servicing Overview -- Managing Through Turbulent Times" and "Bank Integration and Capital Strategies." »Read more

About Funny Business with Jane Wells

  • If it was up to Jane Wells, she’d spend her entire day combing Mother Earth for stories and observations just for this blog. She has more fun writing Funny Business than anything else she does... professionally, that is. Funny business is whatever Jane considers hilarious, strange, fishy, or ridiculous, which pretty much covers everything on Wall Street. It is her hope this blog makes you smile, even when the news is grim. After all, it's only money.


  • Jane Wells

    Based in Los Angeles, Jane Wells is a CNBC business news reporter and also writes the Funny Business blog for CNBC.com.