Funny Business with Jane Wells
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The tapir has been getting alot of attention for representing the Fed's looming taper, but CNBC now offers much better suggestions the animal that best symbolizes the Fed's pullback.
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Profit from "American Idol" without Paying FOX a Dime
Posted By: Jane Wells
This may be my favorite ingeniously cheap PR ploy of the year so far: KFC is STILL trying to convince "Idol" contestant Sanjaya Malakar to sport a "bowl cut," to promote the chain's Famous Bowls. Malakar is the young kid who hulas but doesn't sing very well, yet he continues to advance on "Idol" partly because of a subversive campaign by Howard Stern.
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J-Lo on "Idol," Mother's Day Pitches And More
Posted By: Jane Wells
J-Lo Down Low. Jennifer Lopez will be on "American Idol" this week, and, frankly, I can't wait to see her and Sanjaya have a "session." But the question is, who needs whom more at the moment? Idol's ratings are down 10% according to Nielsen. But Lopez's new album, her first Spanish-language endeavor, sold only 48,000 copies its first week. That's fantastic for....
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The NOT "Million Dollar Challenge" Contest Winner!"
Posted By: Jane Wells
It's been very exciting holding the first Funny Business contest. Sure, we're not "The Million Dollar Portfolio Challenge," but at least we're... well, not. My contest asked readers to explain this incomprehensible press release..
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We Love Our Pets, Blame it on the Weather, & More
Posted By: Jane Wells
WE LOVE OUR PETS MORE THAN OUR CHILDREN
Speaking of April Furhst, The Loneliest Job, and The Contest!
Posted By: Jane Wells
He’s the result of ingenious marketing: The Maytag repairman. Alone. Unneeded. Lonely. Lonelier still, the actor who plays him, Hardy Rawls. He’s being let go. Instead, Maytag’s new owner, Whirlpool, has held a national audition for the “new face” of the repairman. The winner is Clay Jackson of Richmond, Virginia, a former realtor who entered the contest “on a whim.” Man, if I were a realtor in this housing market, I’d also be looking for a more stable career, like acting.
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The Prom Business Has Legs (And The Contest Continues)
Posted By: Jane Wells
As the mother of a couple of high school students (gag me), the prom has turned into a major annual expenditure. By some estimates, Americans spend about $4 billion a year on the event—dresses, tux rentals, flowers, limos, tickets. All for something we all desperately want to attend, believing it will be the highlight of our youth, though it usually turns out to be … just OK.
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Wires Crossed, Girls Gone Legitimate ... and a Contest!
Posted By: Jane Wells
Filthy rich (in every way) Joe Francis, co-founder of Girls Gone Wild, has to show up in a Florida court today to explain why he had a tantrum during mediation to settle a federal lawsuit. Francis is being sued by some teenage girls and their parents for being victimized while “flashing in public.” Maybe you shouldn’t flash in public? Just a thought.
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You Think You Have Problems, Prts. 1, 2, 3...
Posted By: Jane Wells
According to Schering-Plough, 65 MILLION Americans suffer from constipation. That's nearly one in five of us. Really? Are 65 million Americans, like, constipated all the time? Once a month? Bummer. The company is touting the over-the-counter availability of its prescription strength laxative, MiraLAX. The announcement contained this little factoid which caught my eye...
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The Outdoor Litter Box Is Coming (It's About Time)
Posted By: Jane Wells
A San Diego attorney named David Schwartz is seeing dollar signs. He has patented a cat litter box that ... I'm not kidding ... connects the house to the litter box. This way the cat does its business outside without being exposed to the elements. Schwartz came up with the idea because his three cats took over a room in his home and it really smelled.
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Pulp Fiction Indeed And "Curing" Underarm Sweats
Posted By: Jane Wells
Director Quentin Tarantino tells GQ, "I might have been Shakespeare in another life." He says others have told him there are too many parallels, though he himself wouldn't know: "I have never really been into Shakespeare." In 2004, Forbes says 657,000 Shakespeare titles were sold, 388 years after his death. Do you think in 388 years they'll be selling...
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About Funny Business with Jane Wells
If it was up to Jane Wells, she’d spend her entire day combing Mother Earth for stories and observations just for this blog. She has more fun writing Funny Business than anything else she does... professionally, that is. Funny business is whatever Jane considers hilarious, strange, fishy, or ridiculous, which pretty much covers everything on Wall Street. It is her hope this blog makes you smile, even when the news is grim. After all, it's only money.
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Based in Los Angeles, Wells is currently a CNBC business news reporter and also writes CNBC.com's “Funny Business.”
Humor
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The latest video to have gone viral introduces "Prancerise." Exercise will never be the same. Giddyup!
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An image on a JCPenney's billboard advertising a tea pot has a web sensation. It's the spitting image of Adolf Hitler.
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CNBC's Jane Wells goes shopping for a pork belly in order to make her own bacon. She's pleased with the results. And Tom Rotunno looks at a bacon-inspired beer from Rogue Ale.
Most Popular Video
Tuesday, 18 Jun 2013 | 5:58 PM ET
The Fast Money traders share their final trades of the day.
Tuesday, 18 Jun 2013 | 5:00 PM ETAhead of the Fed meeting, the S&P 500 appears headed toward 1,687, StockMonster's Guy Adami says.
Tuesday, 18 Jun 2013 | 6:40 PM ETYou say the name of a stock, and Mad Money's Jim Cramer tells you whether to buy or sell.