We Love Our Pets, Blame it on the Weather, & More
WE LOVE OUR PETS MORE THAN OUR CHILDREN
Why run Gymboree with the real money is at Petco? Here’s the latest proof that we’d rather have a nanny raise the kids, but don’t get between me and my dog: Doggie Yoga classes. That you PAY for. Apparently, they are a hit at the Humane Society in Seattle, where dogs and their masters relax together, with the “upward facing belly pose.” Namaste!
There’s also www.doyoulooklikeyourdog.com, a site tied to a book, a game, even a song, suggesting people want to look like their dogs. That's my dog you see here. If I look like my dog, Homer, I’ve got problems!
BLAME IT ON THE WEATHER
Forget blaming Big Bertha. You are a lousy golfer because of … global warming. That’s the basic premise of a new survey. Here’s how researchers connected the dots:
1) Global warming is causing more poison ivy to grow.
2) Poison ivy affects 22% of golfers (so it says…)
3) Over 12% of golfers blame poison ivy itching for adding strokes to their game, while 11% had to forfeit a whole day of golf because of it.
The survey was conducted by buji, which just happens to sell skin care products.
But this whole “let’s blame global warming for everything” has me wondering how far it can go:
GLOBAL WARMING CAUSED MY DIVORCE
GLOBAL WARMING COST ME A GOOD PARKING SPOT AT COSTCO
GLOBAL WARMING IS THE REASON MY KID CAN’T GET INTO STANFORD
WHAT’S NEW PUSSYCAT, WHOA-OH-OH-OH-OH…NO!
Yes, plastic surgery is a huge business, and entrepreneurs are always looking for the next new product or service to sell. There’s apparently a list 100 names long in Beverly Hills of people waiting for some new anti-oxidant skin cream (my advice, eat blueberries instead). But even in Nip/Tuck land, some surgeons draw a line… and don’t cut it. Singer-heartthrob Tom Jones has had so much “work” done, the 66-year-old told The Daily Mail in London that a Beverly Hills plastic surgeon warned him to just say “no.” Jones says his face could actually collapse, and the doctor “said I should try to look as natural as I can.”
Yesterday I blogged that KFC ALLEGEDLY offered Sanjaya Malakar free KFC bowls for life if he would sport a “bowl cut” on “American Idol.” When I tried to confirm the item I was directed to a phone that was no longer working. Hmmmm. Well, KFC called me back. It’s true! As for Sanjaya, alas, no free chicken for life. His hair Tuesday night was slicked back, not in a "bowl cut." Who needs chicken, though, when this kid could win it all and pull off the biggest upset in Idol history.? He can't sing, but Sanjaya has even Tony Bennett rooting for him.
Comments? Funny Stories? Email firstname.lastname@example.org