Funny Business
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FUNNY BUSINESS VIDEO GALLERY
MOST SHARED
- China Counter-Challenges US Over Subsidies at WTO
- What Would Greek Exit Mean for the US Economy?
- Heard in More US States: See You in Tax Court!
- Bankia Shares Suspended Ahead of Rescue Details
- Option Bulls Take Another Shot on Idenix
- Why Are Greek and Italian Politicians So Bad?
- Shares to Open Higher; Fears Over Greece Persist
- Spain: Too Poor to Win a Singing Contest?
- Markets: Out of Stock
- In Spain, Bank Transfers Reflect Broader Fears
- Top 20 European Stocks for Crisis Time: Strategist
- Curt Schilling’s Videogame Company Goes Bust
- Time for Flash Sales to Adapt or Die
- What Flash Sites Are Suggesting About Consumers
- Hewlett-Packard Faces a ‘Dogfight’ for Talent: Analyst
- Laouchez: Leadership in Financial Services — Missing in Action?
- DuckDuckGo Cooks Google’s Goose: Analyst
- Growing Sub-Prime Auto Loans - New Troubles for Automakers?
- General Electric’s $4.5 Billion Dividend Slated for Buybacks
- Both Campaigns Seize on Romney’s Years at Bain
- What Would Greek Exit Mean for the US Economy?
- Big European Funds Confirm Dumping Euro Assets
- Why Are Greek and Italian Politicians So Bad?
- Time for Flash Sales to Adapt or Die
- HMO Stocks May Struggle Over Health Claim Costs
- ECB Official: On Greece, ‘We Are Working on Plan A’
- Spain: Too Poor to Win a Singing Contest?
- China Counter-Challenges US Over Subsidies at WTO
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Some Real "Scary" Funny Business This Halloween
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Sleep walkers |
The Daily Telegraph reports that Travelodge's Director of Sleep ("Oh, and what do you do for a living?") says most of the naked, ambling, semi-conscious guests show up at the front desk trying to get a newspaper or check out. Problem is, they've sorta checked out already, if you get my meaning, so Travelodge has given employees a "sleepwalkers guide" to deal with the crisis. The guide suggests they keep towels handy at the front desk, "in case a customer's dignity needs preserving." I just wanna know how many of these guys are really sleepwalking...
"DO NOT DISTURB" IS TOO DISTURBING
More in the hotel biz. Embassy Suites is having a huge contest for customers to design new "Do Not Disturb" signs. There are 6,000 entries so far, and you can enter at www.embassysuitesdndcontest.com. Winners will be announced December 1st. Now is your chance to tell Housekeeping EXACTLY WHAT YOU MEAN BY "DO NOT DISTURB"! Here are some of the entries.
Question: what kind of sign would you put on your door to keep trick-or-treaters away after you run out of candy? When the extinguished porch light isn't a big enough hint? When I'm inside just trying to watch "The Daily Show" in peace?
MOST INTERESTING MARKETING ATTEMPT AT A HALLOWEEN TIE-IN
A computer security company called CyberDefender promises you a FREE DAY OF TECH SUPPORT TODAY for your home or office PC. Why today? Because it's Halloween, you idiot! Here's the headline for the pitch from www.cyberdefender.com: "Is Your Computer Possessed? Does It Seem Like Your Hard Drive's Haunted? Reclaim Your Computer from Zombies, Botnets, Viruses and other Malware." Ok, an "A" for effort on that one.
SCARY FED SPEAK
Finally, from Mr. Off-the-Wall Street, musing once again on how the Fed Chief might complicate the mundane:
"Ben Bernanke's version of 'TRICK OR TREAT!' : 'Basically, in the view of Federal Open Market Committee policymakers, the householder faces the following alternatives: Concede, within a brief period, a small portion of assets relative to total net worth, or face downside risk to significant other assets, including, but not limited to, personal property.'"
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Jane Wells is currently a CNBC business news reporter, based in Los Angeles, covering the defense and technology industries. Wells came from CNBC's “Upfront Tonight” where she was senior corresponde


