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Need A Little "Despair.com" In Your Life?

CNBC.com

Thanks to Tim J. for sending me a link to the BEST WEB SITE EVER (ok, I exaggerate): www.despair.com. On Despair.com, they take on the corporate motivational crud you've been forced to eat for years, like those posters which promise to stimulate 'Hope,' 'Success' and 'Teamwork', and turn them on their "corporate head," with a special twist.

Don't be fooled. The "team" behind the site is "hoping" for "success" in making some cash. The merchandising opportunities seem, well, full of possibilities!

In fact, at you can buy posters showing a ballplayer hitting a home run with the word "Possibilities" in large print, only to read under it: "With focus, dedication, and steroids, men can achieve impossible dreams. Like breaking a world record. Or growing their own breasts." You can buy a lithograph of the Great Pyramids with the focus on "Achievement," and the tag line: "You can do anything you set your mind to when you have vision, determination, and an endless supply of expendable labor."

For complete losers, you can buy "Despair wear" T-shirts that say, "More people have read this shirt than your blog" which is, um, true. Or you can buy Demotivators calendarsthat sport pictures of people facing impossibly high mountains with daily messages like, "Remember to Google yourself again today. See what people are saying." Finally, there's the Pessimist's Mug, which "makes everything taste bitter" and has a line de-marking where the glass becomes half empty.

I believe I've found my one-stop holiday shopping place this year.

Comments? Funny Stories? Email funnybusiness@cnbc.com

  • Based in Los Angeles, Jane Wells is a CNBC business news reporter and also writes the Funny Business blog for CNBC.com.

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