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Real Estate, Hollywood & Sex: Welcome to California

ITEM #1: HOMES SELLING AGAIN IN CALIFORNIA

So DataQuick says home sales in the Golden State rose almost 27 percent last month compared to the month before. Hmmm, let me see, who blogged about the possibility that we were bottoming in housing. Who? Who who who... oh yes, that was me.

Of course, in some places most of the houses are foreclosures or short sales, which means prices are still falling -- so it's not quite time to sell unless you have to.

ITEM #2: STRIKE 2 FOR HOLLYWOOD?

Working class actors may have no choice but to sell their homes as it looks less likely SAG and AFTRA will strike a deal with the studios before their contracts expire on June 30.

Can you imagine another strike? Well, maybe you can because you're reading this in Miami and none of this affects the only show you care about -- American Idol. But the news comes as I'm hearing another hit show, "24," is just starting up production again after the writers strike cancelled its entire season this year (they only had eight episodes written when the writers went on strike last fall and some joked they should rename the show "8").

This week, SAG members were briefed on the latest -- which isn't much, as the studios broke off talks with SAG weeks ago. AFTRA, another actors union, broke ranks with SAG and began negotiating with studios unilaterally (et tu, AFTRA). But AFTRA has broken a news blackout to say "a resolution may not be quick or easy."

ITEM #3: "77 MIND-BLOWING SEX POSITIONS"!

Fake Jane's surprise of the month! In the mail came a promotional gift package from a website called Cleo's Boutique, which apparently caters to "women who desire a discreet and comfortable environment in which to explore the world of adult products." !!!!

In the gift box was a "Chocoholics Chocolate Tattoo Set," which lets you stencil on edible tattoos -- but be warned, 90 calories a serving. FJ will just have to look but not eat.

There was also a Kama Sutra bedside "toolkit," a discreet box which includes oils and...other things...so "you may never leave your bed again."

Finally, FJ was most intrigued/disturbed/surprised by the book "The Cosmo Kama Sutra: 77 Mind-Blowing Sex Positions." 77? REALLY? The positions had names like the "Passion Pretzel" and the "Erotic Accordion."

Pretzels. Accordions. Doesn't sound erotic, it sounds painful. But each position came with an illustration and that was a HUGE help.

FINALLY, YOUR EMAILS:

On my post regarding the court decision saying paper money discriminates against the blind (referred to as "she"), which may force the Treasury Department to produce bills of difference sizes, Jason J. writes:

"I am down to help the blind ladies out with different currency but on one condition -- can we please remove all brail drive thru ATM’s?"

Questions? Comments? Funny Stories? Email funnybusiness@cnbc.com

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  • Based in Los Angeles, Jane Wells is a CNBC business news reporter and also writes the Funny Business blog for CNBC.com.

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