Now that we’re starting to feel the effects of a severe recession, it may be time to take desperate, drastic, even insane measures to try and make ends meet.
For those of you who don’t care about culture, the weather, or having much of a social life, I have a suggestion. Follow Sarah Palin back home to the "welfare state" we know as Alaska.
If you can stomach living in Alaska for 12 months, you’ll be eligible to get a check from the Alaska Permanent Fund. Every year this fund, which gets its money by taking a cut of Alaska’s oil revenues, pays out upwards of $1,000 to every citizen of Alaska. In 2008, thanks to Petro-Dictator/Governor Sarah Palin’s decision to slap a windfall profits tax on the oil companies, you would’ve received $3,269. In 2007 the payout was $1,654 and in 2006 it was $1,106.96.
Man, collective ownership of natural resources and a universal basic income? That fits my definition of socialism. There are more pluses to living in the land of the midnight sun. It’s the only state with no sales tax and no state level income tax. And in 2005, the most recent year I have data for, Alaska received $1.84 for every dollar of federal taxes Alaskans paid. That makes Alaska third in the nation, behind New Mexico and Mississippi, when it comes to receiving federal largesse.
I hope none of you miss the irony of Sarah Palin accusing President-elect Obama of wanting to impose socialism on the United States, when she herself governs the closest thing we have to a socialist paradise. Maybe it’s because Alaska’s so close to Russia?
Seriously, if you are completely anti-social, moving to Alaska could be a great way to save money. Not only does the state government not tax you, it gives you money. And the Feds shower your state with cash. The bridge to nowhere may not have been built, but Alaska still got the pork for the road to the bridge to nowhere, so there should be plenty of infrastructure jobs.
One downside, the cost of living in Alaska is pretty high. However, things get cheaper if you live near a city, or what passes for one that close to the north pole, and have access to Wal-Mart, Costco and Sam’s Club, those staples of urban shopping.
If you’re really feeling the pinch, why not give Alaska a try? I mean, aside from all the obvious reasons.
- Palin blames Bush policies for GOP defeat
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