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Fake Steve is Back - With David Pogue's Liver

There is much to celebrate today! It appears that Apple’s Steve Jobs is recovering from his recent liver transplant, a gift of life from the donor. I did a documentary once following the heart, liver, and kidneys of a healthy 18-year-old boy from Texas who died in a car accident. His broken-hearted parents allowed him to save others, even as they said good-bye to their only child. The heart went to a fellow Texan, the liver to a man from Colorado, the kidneys to two people in the Midwest. We don’t know who Jobs’ donor is, but thank you to all the families who make this difficult decision while grieving. You bring life from death.

Ok, on a much, much, MUCH lighter note, there’s a second reason to celebrate today: Fake Steve Jobs is back! Eleven months after Newsweek’s Dan Lyons seemingly retired the hilarious online “diary” of the prickly Apple co-founder, Lyons has, for whatever reason, returned. It started quietly, last Thursday, BEFORE news broke of a transplant. “Feeling … Strange. Am I…in Heaven?” was all Fake Steve had to say that day. The transplant story didn’t break until Friday night. Did Lyons know something? Friday’s post was another one-liner: “Seriously…Where the hell am I?” with a photo that appears to be from the organ-harvesting movie “Coma”. By Saturday, news of the transplant was out, and Fake Steve left another short note in his diary: “Pogue’s liver kicks a**. Namaste, David. I owe you one.”

Yesterday Fake Steve submitted his first long post, clarifying that he actually only took half of David Pogue’s liver. Pogue is the technology reporter for the New York Timeswho also appears on CNBC, and Fake Steve writes that Pogue “wanted me to have the whole (liver). But I was like, David, seriously, I only need half of it, and he was like, ‘Seriously, man, after all you’ve done for me…” FSJ even goes on to claim Pogue wanted him to take a kidney, though Fake Steve doesn’t need a kidney. “And he was like, ‘Just keep it as a backup. Have it frozen or something.’” Finally, Fake Steve exhibits the ego fans have missed. “Truth is, Pogue wasn’t kidding when he said he owes me…Also, I have to tell you, the guy’s liver is friggig primo. Very, very low mileage. Much better than the stuff you get waiting on some list.”

Good to see FSJ hasn’t lost his bite.

Comments on his return, however, are mixed. While most are thrilled (“Welcome home, FSJ. Glad you didn’t go into the light”), not everyone’s amused. One reader commented: “This is as tasteless and inappropriate as I remember all your writings over the years, Dan. And I remember a long way back. Loser. I hope if you ever have a life threatening illness you don't have to read some jacka$$ making fun of you on a blog. Grow up.” That one was signed “Dave” (as in Pogue? Kidding…).

I’ve emailed Lyons asking him if he knew something about the transplant before the rest of us did (though Mike Huckman has been sniffing around this story for months). I’m also hoping to find out how long we can enjoy Fake Steve’s return. Namaste, indeed.

Questions? Comments? Funny Stories? Email funnybusiness@cnbc.com

  • Based in Los Angeles, Jane Wells is a CNBC business news reporter and also writes the Funny Business blog for CNBC.com.

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