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There Must Be A Pony In Here Somewhere


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  • Cindy Perman

      News Editor at CNBC.com and the author of The Pony Blog (ponyblog.cnbc.com). She has also written a book, “New York Curiosities,” and does stand-up comedy.

  • Jane Wells

      CNBC business news reporter, based in Los Angeles, covering the defense and technology industries. She writes the CNBC.com blog Funny Business.

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ABOUT THIS BLOG

The news can get a little heavy sometimes, with debt crises, vicious markets and crappy earnings reports. So, we dispatched our crack reporters, Cindy Perman and Jane Wells, to find some levity amid all this seriousness. May we offer you a Keynesian cocktail with a side of bacon?

Why a Pony? To be clear, there were no ponies harmed in the making of this blog. The blog’s name, “There Must Be a Pony In Here Somewhere,” comes from an old joke, a favorite of Ronald Reagan’s, that essentially means, with a pile of you-know-what this big, there MUST be a pony—a bright side—in here somewhere!

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10 Things Your Contractor Won’t Tell You

Published: Wednesday, 29 Sep 2010 | 2:03 PM ET
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By: Cindy Perman
CNBC.com Staff Writer

There are so many disastrous home renovations that entire television shows are devoted to making it right and restoring sanity to the homeowners.

Image Source | Getty Images
OK, what just happened here?

If you think hiring a professional means you can just delegate the renovation to him and he’ll take care of it, you’re a statistic — and a home-disaster show episode — waiting to happen.

A home renovation isn’t a task to delegate; it’s a task to manage. You need to ask questions upfront, in the middle — and all the way through to the end. Because no matter what happens on this job, your contractor is going home to his house. This “job site” is where you go home. So demand nothing less than excellence.

So, where do you start?

Here are 10 things your contractor won’t tell you — that you absolutely need to know before you start a renovation.

1) I’m not going to be at your house every day.

Sure, this renovation is a big deal to you, but for your contractor, it’s just another job.

“Contractors juggle jobs — it’s just part of the equation,” said Brian Kelsey, a television personality and home-renovation pro. “They need to have multiple jobs going to stay afloat,” he said, which means that they’re almost definitely NOT going to be there every day.

You have to accept this as fact, but what you don’t have to accept is a lack of communications, Kelsey said.

“They won’t tell you these things, because it makes homeowners nervous,” Kelsey said.

So, just make sure you stay on top of them and know what days they’re going to be in your house, how many guys they’re bringing and what they’re doing.

2) I know you’re the one paying, but my loyalties lie with that grungy guy I just let into your house.

When you hire a lawyer, personal trainer or general contractor you think, “That’s my guy. He works for me. He’s looking out for my best interest.”

When it comes to a general contractor, sorry to tell you — he’s not looking out for you. He’s doing his job.

“Unless the errors are flagrant and truly in-your-face, most general contractors’ allegiance tends to be towards his trades and subcontractors,” said Elaine Griffin, an interior designer and author of “Design Rules: The Insider’s Guide to Becoming Your Own Decorator.”

“They’re in a symbiotic relationship (I hesitate to say a fellowship of thieves, because there are tons of great and honest contractors out there!), and each directly depends on the other to make a living, 24/7/365/years on end,” Griffin explains. “Unfortunately, as the client, you're the odd man out.  (Unless you are a big name … Cher's work is always done properly, and so is Donald Trump's.)”

3) I’m a Jack of All Trades — but a master of none.

You have to ask your contractor how he plans to execute your renovation — is he doing it all himself or hiring subcontractors?

You may be inclined to think that having one guy do it all is better — you’ve already met him and vetted him, plus it’s cheaper to have one guy instead of 10, right? Not necessarily.

“Lots of guys are a Jack of All Trades — but a master of none,” said John Hovde, the chief operations manager at Infinity Home Collection in Denver.

“That’s when you can run into problems,” Hovde said. “You’re talking about a skill set … Most guys are probably well-versed in a trade or two but probably not so well versed in all of them,” he said.

With plumbers and electricians, for example, you’re probably better off getting someone licensed.

“Never skimp on these two golden trades,” Griffin said. “And make sure you see your general contractors’ subcontractors’ licenses” – he may show you his, but it’s also important to see all the licenses of the people working on your house.

4) I have a police record in three states.

It’s easy to check a doctor’s qualifications — Chances are, he’s in your insurance network. And, when you walk into his office, you’ll see his degree on the wall. But how do you know if your contractor is licensed and insured, or if he has bad credit and a criminal record in three states? You don’t. Because you’re not walking into his office — he’s walking into YOUR home. Before you open the door, you should check to make sure he’s licensed and ask for proof of insurance for him — and any subcontractors.

Plus, find out if your contractor is bonded. If they’re bonded and fail to finish your job, you’re covered for up to $12,500. If they’re not — you’re out of luck.

And you’re going to want a copy of the lien releases for any subcontractors he’s using. That way, if he decides to not pay them — they’re not going to put a lien on your house.

Gary Drake, CEO of Drake Construction in Los Angeles also advises spending the extra $75 to run a credit check on a future contractor. “If hey have a history of not paying their bills or do not do so in a timely basis, this should raise a red flag,” Drake says. And that could be the best $75 you ever spent.

The National Association of Homebuilders has a searchable director of professional remodelers at http://www.nahb.org/remodel.

Plus, check with your state’s contractor license board. Either Google your state + contractor license board — or use a site like this: http://www.contractors-license.org.

Drake adds that if a contractor knocks on your door, saying he noticed something you may need done and here’s his number — it could be a scam. Ask him to send you an estimate in writing, and check his credentials before you call him back.

5) You probably should’ve picked the other guy.

With remodeling, you get what you pay for. So, the cheapest guy isn’t always the best guy.

“If you get three bids — you might want to look hardest at the middle guy,” Hovde said. “It’s not to say being the low guy or high guy disqualifies you — just that you need to ask a few more questions. If you’re the low guy – what did you leave out or do differently from my other two guys?” he said.

Jan Brady would be so thrilled to hear that sometimes, the middle is the best!



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