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Is Congress Using 'Wrongulator' for Debt Figures?

Friday, 29 Jul 2011 | 5:33 PM ET

CONGRESS IS USING A WRONGULATOR ON DEBT

Someone has played a cruel joke on America. Or at least on our leaders.

U.S. Senate Majority Leader Sen. Harry Reid and Speaker of the House Rep. John Boehner.
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U.S. Senate Majority Leader Sen. Harry Reid and Speaker of the House Rep. John Boehner.

The reason congressional leaders and the President can't agree on how much we need to cut, how much we need to raise, and how much we need to borrow, I believe, is because they're all using the Wrongulator.

The Wrongulator is a calculator which intentionally gives you the wrong answer "101% of the time."

"It is perhaps the cruelest practical joke you could inflict on your office colleague and the chances are, without being told, they'll probably never guess," says the website selling the product, before adding, "Mwhahahaha!"

So while Rep. John Boehner thinks he's cutting nearly a billion dollars in spending, he's wrong. But when the Congressional Budget Office says the Boehner plan didn't cut as much as he said it would, those numbers are wrong, too. Harry Reid's plan? Wrong. Mitch McConnell? Ditto. President Obama? Dunno. Did he actually present a plan? Well, if he did, it was wrong.

Here's what I also suspect. The Wrongulator has been around for 20 years. Congress has obviously been using it for decades.

FROM WRONGULATOR TO JUST PLAIN WRONG...

If you think it's a bit of a stretch to suggest politicians are using Wrongulators, well, hold on to your bedpost. Nothing is as big a stretch as this lawsuit by a woman claiming she deserves compensation for injuries sustained on a work-related trip while having sex in a motel.

Questions? Comments? Funny Stories? Email funnybusiness@cnbc.com

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  • Based in Los Angeles, Jane Wells is a CNBC business news reporter and also writes the Funny Business blog for CNBC.com.

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