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The $1 Million Halloween Costume Idea

Still searching for a Halloween costume? Apparently "Sexy Big Bird" is a hot seller.

Source: ebay.com

Never thought I'd see "sexy" and "Big Bird" in the same sentence. Kermit, maybe. Big Bird, never.

Yandy.com has sold out in most sizes a particularly fetching Big Bird costume which, by the way, doesn't actually use the character's name. The New York Daily News eported the costume caused Sesame's legal team to issue a cease-and-desist order. "We have contacted the sellers of the infringing costumes demanding that they stop producing and selling these (obvious) imitations."

I suspect a jealous Miss Piggy is behind the threats. She's probably upset that Yandy has plenty of "Sexy Miss Piggy" costumes in stock, unable to move the merchandise.

Who knew Muppets would be so hot this year, between the debate and Greg Smith's new book on Goldman Sachs ? (Read More: Goldman Sachs' Tell-All Tells Little.)

But if the Muppets represent the 47 percent (Miss Piggy shudders at the thought), here's a Halloween costume for the 53 percent crowd. Well, more like the one percenters. It's the Human Slinky, selling oneBay for $1 million.

Really?

Buy a foreclosed Beverly Hills mansion for $1 million, or buy a costume which lets you "bounce up and down just like a clown, everyone knows you're" ... crazy?

Source: yandy.com

Buy four Ferraris, or strap on an outfit that may require more dance moves than Gangnam Style?

Buy nearly 60,000 copies of Greg Smith's "Why I Left Goldman Sachs," or scare the bejeezus out of children trick or treating at your door? (My advice, buy the costume.)

The Human Slinky was created by Romanian-born performer Veniamin who's worn it everywhere from Letterman to NHL games. He's been trying to unload it for some time, even promising to give 10 percent of the million bucks to the American Cancer Society. More than 100 people have placed bids. All have been rejected.

Perhaps like the offer itself, bids have been more trick than treat.

Best to save your money and dress as a sexy Muppet this year, even if it means risking a lawsuit from Sesame Street's lawyer (aka Oscar the Grouch).

(Read More: Trendiest Halloween Costumes for Adults.)

One more thing…

Now that you've decided on your costume, let's move on to pumpkin carving.

Bad with a knife? Hate the mess? Here's one way to carve a Jack-o-Lantern without all that cutting and scraping. All you need is a handgun.

—By CNBC's Jane Wells
@janewells

Questions? Comments? Funny Stories? Email funnybusiness@cnbc.com

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  • Based in Los Angeles, Jane Wells is a CNBC business news reporter and also writes the Funny Business blog for CNBC.com.

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