Funny Business with Jane Wells

BA-ROCK, The Pet Rock With 'Hope'

Last year it was the Chia Obama craze. I even bought one.

This year, it's Prez BaRock, a new take on the old pet rock-one of the most disturbing and unfathomable must-have gifts of the 1970s.

Prez BaRock is being pitched as the "perfect gift for best friends and arch enemies; liberals, conservatives and independents alike".


Why would a conservative want a pet rock based on the President? To throw at the TV when Olbermann's on?

"It's bipartisan," Patrick Phipps, CEO of Rockme Novelties told a Seattle radio station. "It's finally a political figure we can all trust." The rock comes with over fifty removable stickers which express sentiments that are either pro Obama or "no Obama". One says "Yes we can", while another says, "No we shouldn't". There's "Change you can count on", and "Change you'll be counting forever". Some stickers are blank, allowing you to get creative. Maybe "Obama 2012!", or "Your Healthcare Plan Will Kill Me", or "He Got a Nobel Peace Prize and All I Got Was This Lousy Rock", or "The Country's Between BaRock and a Hard Place". (I really crack myself up.)

Each $15 Prez BaRock includes a Certificate of Authenticity to, um, well, uh, prove it's really a rock. I've asked where the rocks come from and how many they've sold—will update you later. There's also an "Elegant Briefing Room & Prez Podium" to house the rock. The company is also promising a monthly $1000.00 "personal bailout prize" to customers who send in funny photos of BaRock in action.

The Web site boasts some amazing "testimonials":

"Prez Barock gets me so excited I can't help but stand up and clap every time I am with him." --Nancy P., Washington DC

"Prez BaRock is so affordable he won't break anyone's bank." -- Tim G., Washington DC

"He thought I was annoying before - you should have seen the look on his face when I gave him a Prez BaRock." -- Al G.

"Hail to Prez BaRock!! The more I am with him, the more I believe...that the end is near!!" -- Glenn B., New York, NY

Would you buy one? And what might you write on one of the blank removable stickers? Let me know in the comments below, but keep it clean, people.

Update: I heard from Patrick Phipps of Rockme Novelties. He says the Prez BaRock launched five weeks ago. "We are still getting the word out," he says, adding that the product can be found on Twitter and Facebook. He wouldn't give sales numbers, but "we are quite pleased with our numbers to-date." Phipps says the rocks come from Rock Mountain, a supplier based in Redmond, Washington. "All Prez BaRocks are proudly produced in the USA; assembled and fulfilled from Washington State."

Questions? Comments? Funny Stories? Email