Funny Business with Jane Wells

Germany wins another world beach nudity

Germans are in the throes of ecstasy after winning the World Cup. Expect raucous celebrations. And nudity.

Hey, it's summertime, the weather is warm. In Deutschland, that means it's time to go clothing-optional, at least at the beach.

Beach chairs at a beach, Baltic Sea Spa Binz, Ruegen, Mecklenburg-Vorpommern, Germany
Ulf Boettcher | Look | Getty Images

Expedia has released its annual "Flip Flop Report," surveying beach habits the world over. The travel site gathered data from more than 11,000 adults in 24 countries. Here are the highlights, or lowlights, depending on your perspective.

Germans are most likely to sunbathe nude, with 28 percent of them "having spent a day at the beach in the buff." This is apparently the third year in a row the Germans win the title. However, this year Austria tied the Germans at 28 percent, and then does them one better: Nearly half of Austrian women are likely to go topless at the beach, 49 percent, compared to only 36 percent of German women.

Read MoreUS nude tourism goes upscale at resorts, cruises

The Japanese can only imagine all that sunburned skin across the Rhine. According to Expedia, 72 percent of Japanese adults are comfortable with the idea of beach nudity, but only 2 percent actually do it.

Where rich & famous discreetly vacation
Where rich & famous discreetly vacation

Here's the most disturbing find in the Expedia survey, at least to Americans: 74 percent of the world considers Speedo-style briefs "acceptable beach attire." That's a lotta people liking the clingy male swimsuit that leaves little to the imagination and requires washboard abs to be even remotely this reporter's opinion.

Some places really, really love Speedos. In Brazil, 95 percent think they're just fine. Perhaps that's a good thing, because all those Germans celebrating the World Cup will probably be wearing Speedos at Brazilian beaches, as Expedia claims 91 percent of Germans approve of the Speedo look, too.

That is, when they aren't going to the beach nude.

—By CNBC's Jane Wells.