If you're tending a broken heart this Valentine's Day, you could try eating your body weight in heart-shaped candies or you could engage in some petty revenge by christening a cockroach with your ex's namesake.
It's a perfect form of easy payback for that worthless someone whose existence now brings you about as much joy as finding a four-inch long cockroach in your kitchen does.
Once you've dubbed your cockroach, you will receive a certificate commemorating the act, though the name will be missing as the U.K. zoo doesn't want to "fuel a fire." It does have a message box, though, so you can always add the name and some choice words about the break up there.
The name will also be displayed on HCC's "roach board" at the insect's enclosure — meaning you can visit the insect embodiment of your ex whenever you need a reminder why you're better off without them. (The sight should also put you off wistful longing and drunk texting them.)
HCC has also promised to post a picture of the board to its Facebook and Instagram account on Feb. 14, in case you can't get there in person or want to forward that picture on to a certain someone.
Just be sure click the "add a note" button at checkout so you can enter the name you'd like to give the roach and note that you want it to be featured on the board.
If you're in New York and looking for insect-based payback a little closer to home, the Bronx Zoo has a similar program that allows you to name one of their 50,000 giant Madagascar hissing cockroaches, though they're taking a more positive spin encouraging people to name a bug after their current bae as a $15 symbol of unending love.
"After the chocolates have been eaten and the flowers wilt, roaches remain thriving and triumphant. Give the gift that's eternal," the zoo's website states.
Of course, you can take it the other way and show your ex how unending you disdain is. You can even mail this certificate directly to your ex to let them know exactly how you feel.
And finally, Zoo Boise in Idaho offers a similar option for only $10.
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