Harvard-trained expert shares her No. 1 strategy for getting people to trust you: 'That's what I would do'

If you want to be successful, fostering trust with others is a great way to start. But leading by example isn't the best way to do so, says a Harvard-trained leadership advisor.

Most people think, "Let me demonstrate to you my competence as a leader, and you will come to trust me," Yasmene Mumby, founder of management consulting firm The Ringgold, tells CNBC Make It. But really, she adds, trust comes from people knowing "that you have their back, that they're supported by you and that your support isn't going to be used for exploitation later."

Building that type of deeply ingrained connection comes from a single strategy, Mumby says: active listening.

The better of an active listener you can be — staying engaged in all of your conversations, and showing that you understand where the other person is coming from with your responses — the more other people will trust you, she says.

"Go in utilizing your deep, inquiry-based listening," says Mumby. "That's what I would do."

It's a relatively simple and straightforward strategy, though not necessarily an easy one to master. Hold your conversation partner's eye contact, sit still instead of fidgeting and wait for the other person to fully finish their thought before speaking, mental health coach Amanda O'Bryan recommended last year in a Positive Psychology blog post.

When you do speak, consider asking open-ended follow-up questions like "How did that make you feel?" or "How can I help?" O'Bryan added.

The trick is giving people your undivided attention, says Mumby: Any kind of mental multitasking, like making sure you remember exactly what you want to say next or finding yourself accidentally daydreaming, can make you miss part of the conversation.

Only 2.5% of people can actually multitask effectively, according to a 2010 study from the University of Utah's psychology department.

Chances are, you're a mono-tasker — if you think you're doing two things at once, you're probably task-switching or completing tasks in rapid succession, neuropsychologist Cynthia Kubu told the Cleveland Clinic's health blog in 2021.

Mumby's strategy may feel doable in small doses. For it to really be effective, you need to make it a regular practice, she says: One uninterrupted conversation won't garner someone's trust overnight. It takes time and repetition, so be patient and trust the process.

"[For some people], no matter what you do, you just need to show them that you're going to be there," she says. "You need to be able to demonstrate that you're consistent and you don't switch up when the moment is right."

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