Market Melt-Up, Penney's Sale, and Weiners for All! on Talking Squawk

Talking Squawk: Blogging tidbits, insight and some sarcasm on the WEEK THAT WAS and the WEEK TO COME from the notepad of the senior executive producer of "Squawk Box."

NYSE traders
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Remember back on Monday? Buzz words in the newsroom included: "Mad Men" ... Louisville vs. Michigan ... North Korea ... Alcoa ... GE ... Portugal ... and The Iron Lady (R.I.P.)

OK, now let's fast forward. The weekend is almost here!

"Louisville" is now The Masters. "Portugal" is now Dow 15K or Market Melt-up; plus a whole bunch of new curve-ball buzz topics including Fed Flub ... for the way it botched the release of its own minutes. Obama also sent us a late, Un-passable Budget ... while the Nuclear Nut-job in North Korea just won't go away.

Ron Johnson
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Ron Johnson

Career Guidance

Um, just because you can sell iPads and iPhones for Apple doesn't mean you understand back- to-school shopping, white linen sales, teen fashion, and Black Friday.

My career suggestions to now former JC Penney CEO Ron Johnson: Dude, it didn't work out, but you still have a ton of money, go lay on a beach for a while.

To hedge fund manager and Penney board member Bill Ackman who handpicked Johnson to turnaround the retailer: Bill, try the Peter Lynch strategy until things calm down a bit. Invest in what you know. When was the last time you bought a suit at the JC Penney's men's department? (er, Herbalife?)

State of the Art Investment?

I'm not suggesting he did it for tax reasons, however, just so I understand: Leonard Lauder gave away 33 of his Picassos, 17 Braques, 14 Légers and 14 works by Gris that are now valued around a billion dollars.

But as Joe Kernen pointed out, how much did he pay for works originally? And how much will he be able to write off now compared to if he waited for Obama's plan for a 28 percent limit on deductibility could kick-in?

In today's world, how is it possible to give away a billion dollars and still walk away with a profit on your investment? And get your name on an entire wing at the Met?

Tweets of Note

@beckyquickcnbc: Our guest host Brian Belski getting mixed reviews for his fashionable glasses after Joe's comments. Your thoughts?

(My thoughts? Brian, they are doing amazing things with contact lenses these days.)

Our Director @PaulDeFabo There's a sale at Penneys!

(Bad news, the fog is getting thicker. (Johnny) And Leon's getting laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrger. Gotta love "Airplane"!)

Mark Your Calendar (or Set Your DVR)

Monday: Guest Host Bob Doll of Nuveen

Tuesday: Guest Host PE billionaire Wilbur Ross

Wednesday: Michael Ward, CSX CEO (Earnings)

Thursday: Guest Host John Stumpf, Wells Fargo CEO

Friday: Guest Host Mark Bertolini, Aetna CEO; Guest Host Toby Cosgrove, Cleveland Clinic CEO

'Squawkward Moment'

Joe: (To the CEO of athenahealth) "The Doctor told me that I have the best looking colon he has ever seen."

Becky: "I bet he says that to all the guys."

The Disruptors

These are the men and women out there changing the world by "disrupting" the way we live, work, and play. Most are young, smart, and geeky. But some of them have ideas that are going to make them very, very rich (and then they won't care how geeky they are because they'll have supermodels on each arm).

Next week, you'll meet a whole bunch of them on "Squawk" including the heads of Poshmark, Tapad, Menlo Ventures, Sherpa, Github, Stripe, Nest Labs, App Annie, Google Ventures and Rockmelt.

What a Weiner

Joe proves his manhood by proving he can say Weiner on national TV (and even make Becky say it) and no one can stop him. "Weiner" Weiner" "Weiner" (video)

Joe Kernen and Becky Quick tackle the daily 'Word Jumble'
Matt Belvedere | CNBC
Joe Kernen and Becky Quick tackle the daily 'Word Jumble'

Word Jumble

In case you are new, it's one of "Squawk Box's" oldest traditions. After the show, Joe and Becky compete every day to see who can be the first to solve the "Word Jumble" puzzle in the newspaper.

After being on a roll a few weeks ago, last week was a disaster for Becky. This week wasn't much better on the scoreboard; however I should note both contestants unscrambled almost all the words in each puzzle. Joe just beat Becky to more of the "answer riddles" you have to solve with letters from all the unscrambled words (yes, geeks!)

This week's score: Joe three, Becky one.

Words we stumbled on when jumbled, Becky: skycit (sticky) upalrl (plural); Joe didn't have any stumbles.

Because Joe won the week: He gets another bonus jumbled word: ypgmur

*Answer at the end

Worth Another Look

It was "Squawk Masters Week" (we even made Joe wear a green jacket; maybe we should have spent more for a better fake-version of a real Masters green jacket)!

Marc Faber: Spread his gloom and doom on the nation saying a stock market crash is likely if this rally continues (Great! Thanks Marc) (story).

Bill Gross: On why he doesn't watch "The Walking Dead" and says beware of "Monetary Red Bull" (story).

Sir Richard Branson: On Air, Space-Walks, and Submarines (story).

The Squawk Reserve

St. Louis Fed President James Bullard says he'd be willing to start scaling back QE (story).

Kimihiro Hoshino | AFP | Getty Images

Because You Voted…

Think you are smarter than a Wall Street analyst? Now you can prove it in our new "Armchair Analysts" poll.

On Friday, 64 percent of our armchair analysts predicted JPMorgan would beat estimates and they were right.

Next call?

Citigroup is reporting earnings Monday morning. The estimate is $1.17 a share. Will the company meat, beat, or miss? Vote now on our Facebook page, and we'll see what happens on Monday Morning.

(Also, Blackberry beat Apple in a landslide to win our Squawk Money Madness Tournament, Go figure?!)

Oracle Chairman Larry Ellison
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Oracle Chairman Larry Ellison


Larry Ellison made $96 million in salary last year. Wow, that's a lot. But when you're worth over $40 billion do you really still keep count? (Actually I bet he knows where every penny is!)

Data Preview

Monday: Empire State Mfg. Survey (8:30 a.m. ET)

Tuesday: CPI (8:30 a.m. ET), Housing Starts (8:30 a.m. ET)

Wednesday: Bank of Canada Announcement (9 a.m. ET)

Thursday: Jobless Claims (8:30 a.m. ET), Philadelphia Fed Survey(10 a.m. ET)

Friday: It's "vewy, vewy" quiet (Too quiet!?), thanks Elmer Fudd!

Squawk Box's Joe Kernen morphed into a trader.
Squawk Box's Joe Kernen morphed into a trader.

Hair Nation

In the Control Room, we love matching "Squawk" guests with Joe's or Andrew's hair and vice versa. This week, Joe always wanted to wear one of those trader coats.

Earnings Preview: Next Week is Huge!

Monday: Citigroup (C)

Tuesday: BlackRock (BLK), CSX Corp (CSX), Goldman Sachs (GS), Intel (INTC), Johnson & Johnson (JNJ), The Coca Cola Co (KO), and Yahoo! (YHOO)

Wednesday: Bank of America (BAC), PNC Financial (PNC)

Thursday: Google (GOOG), Microsoft (MSFT), PepsiCo (PEP), Union Pacific (UNP), and Verizon (VZ)

Friday: General Electric (GE), McDonald's (MCD), State Street (STT), and SunTrust (STI)

Cramer Clip

Check out @jimcramer trying on his fancy new clothes (for Masters week the "Mad Man" became our newest "Squawk Master")!

Looking Forward to the Weekend Because ...

For me, spring begins with "The Masters."

*Joe's Bonus Word Jumble: "Grumpy"

By CNBC's Matthew Quayle. Follow him on Twitter @matthew_quayle