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Segway Polo Nerds; Also: Your Mortgage Hardball E-Mails

STEVE WOZNIAK PLAYS ROUGH

Segway Polo
Segway Polo

While the rest of you are glued to the so-called "sports" at the Olympics, like running and jumping and swimming and...trampoline...the REALLY hot sport of the moment is Segway Polo. Check out the logo!

Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak is a player/fan. The International Segway Polo Association recently announced the winners of the 2008 Woz Cup Challenge -- THE CALIFORNIA GOLD RUSH! -- which pulled out a victory over the Silicon Valley Aftershocks.

For those of you who consider this the epitome of geekiness (and you may have a point there), Segway polo can get pretty rough. Stuart Moore of the Aftershocks tells FlashNews, "Some of us do push the boundaries and play by the motto 'If it's not in the rules, it's allowed.'" Kind of like Chinese gymnastic age limits. Rule-breaking-but-allowable play includes the occasional mallet to the face. Revenge of the nerds, indeed!

MORE 'COUGAR' NEWS

Fake Jane is back! Tan, rested, and plasticized. She's thrilled the term 'cougar' is reaching critical mass -- a derogatory term used to describe older women who like to pursue younger men.

Now, from the man's point of view, comes a book from LuLu Press called "How to Date Older Women," by Andrew Dolan.

Dolan dispenses advice like the importance of giving lingering looks, "the kind that makes someone want to come up to you and say 'Hi.'" He also says older women prefer their men clean (does this mean younger women don't?) "Lots of guys don't like to shower on the weekends," Dolan says, "but if you have bad body odor, an older woman isn't going to talk to you."

While you can buy the book on the LuLu site, Amazon.com says it's already out of print. By the way, I checked out Lulu Press, which claims it is not a publisher. Read this and please explain to me what it is, then.

JANICE DICKINSON, THE ORIGINAL MICHAEL PHELPS (?!)

Speaking of 'cougars', another tidbit from FlashNews. Former super model-turned reality TV host Janice Dickinson tells the Web site that she's just like uber-Olympian Michael Phelps.

"Phelps' dedication and drive reminds me of myself," Dickinson says, proving that her sense of self-esteem is certainly gold-medal worthy. "At nine years old I knew I wanted to be a model, and at nine years old he was in the pool."

Ah. Hey, if Phelps can be on a box of Wheaties for "The Breakfast of Champions", why can't Dickinson be on a tube of Botox for "The Brunch of Beverly Hills"?

MORTGAGE HARDBALL: YOUR EMAILS

Lots of emails regarding my blogs on Kim and Scott Fisher's difficulty in selling their home, finally ending when Wells Fargo agreed to a short sale.

Mike L., a lender, writes:

"Ahhh, but there's always a catch because as your Mom told you, there's no such thing as a free lunch. The Fishers will now have a $35K mortgage collection/charge off on their credit for the next 7 years. This effectively eliminates any hope they have of buying another house for a minimum of 3-5 years under current FHA and FNMA guidelines.

So while it may seem like a good, simple solution that's in everybody's best interests, it's really not in the best interest of anyone. Except WAMU who got all their money and the real estate agents who got their commissions regardless of the losses incurred by Wells Fargo and/or the Fishers. It may well be the best possible solution for Fisher and Wells Fargo at the present time, there are serious repercussions involved."

Jim C. ("Hondo") writes:

"Good to see somewhat of a good ending for once in all this housing 'web' mess!...In our area (the Silicon Valley) I either do my running or walking daily and have noticed several houses that are foreclosed with one having the big ol' padlock on the door and a sign on the window stating 'bank owned'. My god I wish this housing mess would end, but ya know I think it is going to take some time!!!"

From Gregory A.:

"It's amazing what a little press coverage can do, in huge bureaucracies. I sometimes wonder how much of our damage is self-inflicted. A lot, I'd presume."

Jeremy Brandt from www.CashOffer.com writes:

"Many home owners make the mistake of trying to request a short sale before they are behind in payments. This almost never works - if the bank thinks you can pay, the will not discount the loan."

Questions? Comments? Funny Stories? Email funnybusiness@cnbc.com