Cramer comes out every night trying to give you good advice as your investing coach, and one of his missions is to refute all the nonsense and misdirection plays that get thrown your way.
The latest canard?
The phone war between Google and Apple now that Google has released its new super-phone, the Nexus One.
Reading some of the stories, "You’d think these two companies were locked in a steel cage claymation death match war of annihilation. Stalingrad. Tarawa. Iwo Jima," Cramer noted in Thursday's program. "Take a look at the front page off today’s Financial Times, 'Net wars—Google and Apple go head-to-head in the battle for Mobile supremacy.'
"Phone war? Please. How about a little truth: This isn't a phone war, it's a phony war, a smartphone siztkrieg where the main players should all, I'm not kidding, all, make money for you."
According to Cramer, the commentators have taken a page from the Mel Gibson Beyond Thunderdome playbook, "acting like only the iPhone or the Nexus One can survive — two phones enter, one phone leaves."
It's actually a lot more like the three-way competition between the Nintendo Wii, Sony Playstation and Microsoft XBOX, where there’s room for all three, Cramer said.
"The commentators have got it dead wrong, and I've been searching trying to find who's got it dead right ... and we can learn a lot from Warren Buffett acolyte and acronym entertainer, Lady GaGa, as in G-A G-A which in my book stands for Google/Apple at war Google/Apple at peace, GAGA. It’s not a war, it is just a bad romance."
Lady Gaga has, wittingly or unwittingly, defined this debate with her latest work, confirming her prodigy state and visionary status, Cramer said.
"Only Morgan Stanley’s smart phone work can come near the clarity of her analysis," he continued. "Did she have advanced warning of the Nexus One? I struggle daily over the question."