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More Emails—Including the Free Donut Ban

Gary L. saw my funny post about the White House and gave a serious reply:

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By: Gary L.

"Our country is in real trouble. We who live in California have a state with major fiscal problems. The federal government earns just so much. Its spending is out of control. Are there forces trying to cripple America? We cannot afford this. I can't believe how billion dollar figures are printed in the paper everyday. How many billion dollars are being spent on our embassy in London ? Does the public realize how different things will be with China as our boss?..."

Gary even supplied artwork!

Some funny replies to my blog about Bride Porn :

From Niall!:

"I'll come and clean your kitchen if you loan me your biz briefs !!"

Brendan H: "You're suggesting men put their testicles in a jar BEFORE the wedding?"

Lou G.: "For years I've been trying to figure out why my wife is less responsive physically on Saturday nite...the very day I do all the cooking ever since we married. For years I couldn't figure it out. I thought I was being so romantic, trying every fancy recipes I could get my hands around, fancy wine, sexy desserts, high-priced gourmet chocolate etc..How stupid of me, always asking her to clean-up after I cooked !!!

Rob W. didn't think much of the Russian gazing who had to give up his $54 million deposit on a French estate: "Gee, he could have paid all of my credit card debt, mortgage and my kids college tuition and all of my co workers bills and still had millions left....what a moron."

Finally, a lot of emails about the hardware store banned from handing out free donuts and coffee :

Beth W.: "This is a very disturbing and worrisome development in public health enforcement. The place where I get my car fluids serviced gives away free cookies that the owner's elderly mom makes. It's a local tradition--everyone goes there for the cookies! I will name neither the business nor its location. If those cookies get busted, a lot of people in these parts will be driving around with dirty oil."

Tom S.: "The most disturbing thing in the story is the polling numbers - 2.7 percent of the 'population' are concerned about food safety and have ruined it for the rest of us. The same 2.7 percent are obviously incapable of running their lives so they are compelled to make the rest of us suffer because of their absurdness..."

Lawrence S.: "People need to tell the government to go to hell when they act beyond their power. Sue the bastards, run them out of office!!"

Nicholas: "Get a poll going, crush this little (excuse me... BIG) government nonsense !!!"

Bob D.: "Gee, the politicians have driven California into bankruptcy???? How could that happen with all the intelligent people they have. When they come sucking around for a bailout maybe we will give them coffee and donuts."

Steve G.: "That means no more donuts brought to any meeting anywhere in the county. Right? It means no bringing of food by a worker to be shared with other workers. Right? No pitch-in anything. No bringing of birthday cakes for celebrations and such. Right? What a wonderful sharing example for our children and what a bunch of selfish do-gooders."

Tony M.: "Some wineries up in Sonoma County have been told they can't serve cheese and crackers between tastings for similar reasons..."?

Jack A.: "Must be more grey matter in the holes of the doughnuts than the brains of the local officials."

Questions? Comments? Funny Stories? Email funnybusiness@cnbc.com