The Worst Toys Ever

As Goldman Sachs reports that Amazon , Walmart and Target are starting to run out of toys, you may be in for a desperate hunt to fill junior's stocking over the next couple of days.

Phillipp Nemenz | Stone | Getty Images

But don't get too desperate.

A friend with too much time on his hands sent me a list of the worst toys ever.

These are real toys.

Let's start with the least offensive: Milky the Marvelous Milking Cow. The only thing more ridiculous than the cow which provides "pre-tend milk" is the jingle created to go with her.

But Milky has her fans: One of the vintage toys is available on eBay for $48.50. Nine bids last check.

On a more disturbing note, there's the Remco Baby Laugh-a-Lot Doll. Give this to your child and I guarantee she'll never want another toy again. She'll want therapy.

This next toy had me asking, "Is this for real?" Alas, the Baby Pee Pee (or Wee Wee) doll is real. A little too real.

Did you know Barbie has a dog which defecates? It's currently out of stock at Amazon, but maybe next Christmas!

Finally, those folks at Mego had quite a sense of humor. The toy company famous for dominating the action figure category in the 1970s once sold agame called Ball Buster. "It's a family game!"

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