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Are You Tweeting Too Hard?

I've been on Twitter since Dec. 22, 2008. I have sent out more than 12,200 tweets. That's an average of 16 tweets a day.

That's a lot. That's a problem.

Twitter
Twitter

Yesterday I tweeted, "Geez. I thought it was Friday." This is exactly the sort of mind-numbing, web-filling digital message crowding our atmosphere.

My tweets are fast approaching the sort of useless, self-serving nonsense which will qualify them for TweetingTooHard.com, "Where self-important tweets get the recognition they deserve."

Tweeting Too Hard is a case study of America's self-absorption. I particularly like the tweets in the "All Time Top" category. Leading the pack is @joshuabaerwith this gem: "fan belt light came on in the 911 so now I'm driving the Cayenne Turbo S - the backup, backup car. Trying not to think about the Tesla..." The comments in response are brutal. "When's the UN going to recognise the plight of the a**hole forced into driving his second-choice Porsche?" writes @seandaisy. Some wonder if @joshuabaeris just joking. Methinks not. He's been recognized for other tweets, like "find myself using the incorrect terminology MD5 'encryption' instead of 'hashing' because the audience I'm talking to understands it better."

Then there's @babesmcphee, who tweeted, "OMG i was saying how i couldn't afford the gas to fly daddy's jet to the riviera this summer, and this barista totally rolled her eyes at me." She really has to be pulling my leg. Other tweets from her include, "i kid you not, i have a follower who is only following britney spears, russell brand, kim kardashian, gossip girl, and me," and "it's so life-affirming when the poor fall in love." I think I'm falling in love with the idea that she's being hilariously facetious. I hope so. If so, she's a genius. If not, at least I feel better about myself.

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