Doggie Obesity? Here's One Answer!


Stair of the Dog 2022
Source: MoreTh>
Stair of the Dog 2022

These days, even our dogs are fat, and one proposed solution proves we are living in the end times.

Someone's created an $8,000 stair lift to haul Fido up and down the stairs.

A U.K. insurance company called More Th>n (you read that ">" correctly) has developed "Stair of the Dog 2022," a stair lift built specifically for dogs. The company says Britain has turned into a land filled with Falstaffs, the fattest nation in Europe behind Malta. One in three dogs in the U.K. is already obese, and that number is expected to rise to 52 percent in ten years.

Oh, I forgot to mention, More Th>n also sells pet insurance.

Stair of the Dog 2022 is a prototype that allows dogs to operate the lift themselves. "The machine...features a special 'paw push' start button situated close enough to the ground for the animal to reach with an outstretched leg," writes the Daily Mail.

"Pets can clamber into the plastic basket which then raises several feet off the floor before carrying the four-legged passenger up the stairs."

More Th>n doesn't seem to be seriously considering mass production of the stair lift. Its press release suggests it would prefer people put their obese dogs on diets. Not only is that better for the dogs, it's better for More Th>n. This way, the company can keep your pet insurance premiums and not be forced to pay out funds to cover the vet bills of your fat dog.

The company quotes veterinarian Joe Inglis, who says, “The stair lift for dogs is an innovative product, but ultimately it’s a sad state of affairs that we’re even talking about it."

Look, if you're going to spend $8,000, buy the dog a Stair Master, not a Stair Lift. Make the dog "ruff" it.

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