Dazed and Confused on a Friday

It's a confusing Friday.

Here are a few things fogging up the brain.

First, signs of change. What's my sign? Used to be Aries. Maybe it's now Pisces. No wonder my horoscopes were always wrong. Upside: big business for tattoo removal experts.

Second, someone is attempting to sell a live-action porn versionof...The Simpsons. Marge is going blue in a whole new way. Ay carumba!

Third, if you need a pay day loan, you'll be confused if you stumble onto the Predatory Lending Association. It looks legit. It's a spoof. It's hilarious.

THE_ROYALS_COVER2.jpg
Source: Bluewater Productions

Fourth, they're making a comic bookabout Prince William and Kate Middleton.

Really?

"Here you have two people trapped in a fishbowl," says publisher Bluewater Productions.

How exciting!

Bluewater has previously released graphic novels on everyone from Betty White to Justin Bieber!

They have so far inexplicably ignored Snooki.

Fifth, it's now a crime in Californiato pretend to be someone else on Facebook, which pretty much indicts all of us. I, for one, am not nearly as fun and entertaining as I make myself out to be on the social networking site. Pretty soon they'll make it a crime to put misleading self-portraits on Match.com, and that'll be the end of online dating.

Finally, NPR did a story on the marijuana industryin northern California. It claims some growers pay $14,000 for mechanical trimmers. $14,000?? Who makes such a machine? Caterpillar? Deere ? No. At least not yet. One is made by Keirton Manufacturing of Canada, called The Twister. Click here for a videoof how these machines work.

For less money, there's the Pro Cut Magic Trimmerbeing demonstrated here (with the sound of children in the background!). Then there is the Handy Trimmer, so which you can no longer buy online.

The best part of the demonstration videos isn't the videos, it's the comment section. "I really don't like mechanical trimmers because they take all the medicine off of the outside of the buds and then I buying sub-par medicine," writes "thebudreview". Someone called "eyewannagofast" replies, "Then you lil cry babies grow your own, you OBVIOUSLY have never spent the time trimming over a hundred plants."

My brain is on overload. So much to take in. Thank goodness it's Friday.

Questions? Comments? Funny Stories? Email funnybusiness@cnbc.com