With Shaquille O’Neal off to the Cleveland Cavaliers, it’s time for me to give him a new nickname. As many of you know, I’m not just another reporter who is giving the big man a suggestion. I’m the guy who dubbed him “The Big Cactus.”
If you don’t believe me, click here and watch how I proposed the name, which did not have a single Google hit at the time. It all happened with Shaq live on air and he, of course, eventually adopted it. It’s a nice thing for the resume, though I’m still waiting for my “15 percent,” whatever that means.
Cleveland is a little bit harder, so I’ve searched the Internet to find some good candidates. I have no doubt Shaq (@THE_REAL_SHAQ) might have his own contest in the next couple hours to poll his million plus followers on Twitter, but at least we can say we’re first out of the gate here.
Here are the explanations behind each name. LeBrawn is obviously a reference to a beefed up LeBron. Shaqron can be pronounced like Akron or LeBron.
I’m partial to Shaqen Loans, since he’s kind of on loan and the team plays in Quicken Loans Arena. Shaqer Heights has a nice ring to it, as Shaker Heights, the city, is located less than 10 miles from Cleveland.
Some people think Shaq's move to Cavs will have nothing to do with LeBron staying, but if it does, he might be called the Cleveland Plain Deal Sealer. The big paper in town is, of course, the Cleveland Plain Dealer. And finally, the Eery Canal, as the lane gets much more scary with Shaq in the center.
Vote on your favorite nickname below. We’re also taking write-ins at firstname.lastname@example.org and @darrenrovell1on Twitter. Polls will close at 4 p.m. ET today.