To avoid spats over spending, Janine and Dom Detore — stars of CNBC's "Staten Island Hustle," who have been married for 27 years — say there is a simple mindset couples can cultivate.
They would know — with seven kids and two businesses (Dom is a general contractor and owner of 2D Construction in Staten Island and Janine owns a children's boutique) the Detores have had to learn how to make it all work.
The key, Janine explains, is respecting each other's financial decisions, even when you disagree.
"It's when you work together as a team that this works," Janine says. "Once you start disrespecting each other, and each other's space and each other's feelings and their thoughts, your marriage is lost."
The Detores live that philosophy. In 2006, the couple disagreed on whether to invest in a new business. "[Dom] tells me ... he wants to open up a car wash," Janine remembers. "Like, what do you know about washing cars?"
Dom's plan was to build the facility and sell it for a profit — not to run the business himself. (He admits to knowing "nothing" about washing cars.) He went through with the project, but by the time the construction was complete, the recession hit.
"There were no banks loaning money, there was nothing, so I couldn't get a buyer," he explains.
The Detores had to operate the car wash themselves. And even though Janine was originally against the idea, she jumped in to help. The Detores operated it together for the three years.
"Instead of saying every day, 'Why'd you do this? Why'd you do this? Why'd you do this?' She comes and she puts her time in and helps me out," Dom says.
In the end, Janine even cherishes some of those memories. "Ronnie grew up in the car wash," she says of their youngest son, now 11.
And the support goes both ways: In an upcoming episode of CNBC's "Staten Island Hustle," Janine tells Dom she spent nearly $8,000 on cosmetic procedures. On the show, Dom wasn't thrilled but barters with the dermatologist, promising to do several construction jobs around the office to pay off the bill.
"A remodel for a remodel," Janine says on the show.
Dom and Janine support each other's businesses however they can.
"When I needed my new store built, he was there front and center," Janine says of her Staten Island children's boutique, Country Mouse. And she returns the favor with design choices for his construction projects. "If he needs a tile picked for a kitchen, he'll ask me to come over to one of the houses, or to one of the businesses that he's building and I'll help him with that."
At the heart of respecting your partner's financial decisions, the Detores say, is believing in your partner.
"My wife has always trusted in my judgment because she knows my judgment is for the family," Dom explains. "If you have to constantly argue or worry about what your partner is doing when they're not with you, they're not the right partner, plain and simple."
All new episodes of "Staten Island Hustle" air Wednesdays at 10P ET/PT on CNBC.
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