Funny Business with Jane Wells

Hello Kitty Hell

Some people hate Barbies. Some hate Snuggies. Some hate puppies.

Jeffrey S. hates Hello Kitty.

For three years, the professional blogger who prefers not to use his whole name "as the Hello Kitty fanatics are pretty hard core" has been mocking the ubiquitous kitten-themed merchandise from Japanese-based Sanrio. He releases his rants on a blog called

Jeffrey S.'s hatred for the Kitty started after his wife began selling Sanrio merchandise. He says the missus always thought Hello Kitty was cute, so he encouraged her to turn her hobby into an income-generating enterprise. "The problem is that when she discovered she could make money with Hello Kitty, her hobby greatly expanded to include practically anything Hello Kitty...I now find myself in a catch-22 Hello Kitty Hell." ?

Finding himself surrounded by Hello Kitty toilet paper (four kinds!) Jeffrey S. needed an outlet.

So he started the Web site, where he posts all the outrageous ways Hello Kitty fanatics express their love for the Sanrio cat. By the way, Sanrio stock was up earlier this week on expectations that profits last quarter grew nine percent thanks in large part to Hello Kitty's overseas sales. Overseas for us. Or U.S.

I found Jeffrey S.'s Web site this week when he posted the Hello Kitty chainsaw . "

There are some combinations that just should never go together," he wrote about the item.

Hunting around I discovered there's also a Hello Kitty AK-47 , Hello Kitty wedding rings , even a Hello Kitty Jesus tattoo.  ?

But Jeffrey S. says the item that's generated the most traffic is the Hello Kitty massager.

Ironically, most of the site's visitors are Hello Kitty fans—"it's probably the most popular Hello Kitty blog out there these days". ?

If his wife could make money selling Hello Kitty, could he make money mocking it online? "This was never supposed to be a money making blog, although it does make low five figures these days." HELLO, KITTY! "There is definitely potential to grow it and monetize it more, but I have no desire to spend any more time on it than I already do."

I asked him if there's anything that can top the outrageousness of the Hello Kitty chainsaw. "Never underestimate the evil feline," Jeffrey S. says. "Just when you think you have seen it all, something else appears that makes you shake your head."

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