Funny Business with Jane Wells

Schmuck Insurance—So Easy Two Billionaires Can Do It

Bill Ackman and Carl Icahn
Getty Images

One of the most amusing comments to come out of the entire Bill Ackman-Carl Icahn spat was the revelation that the two agreed to "schmuck insurance."

(Read More: Icahn, Ackman in Epic Showdown of Billionaires.)

Ackman wrote in a press release:

"On March 1, 2003, on behalf of my former fund, Gotham Partners, I entered into a contract with Carl Icahn, signed by him, to sell him a 15% stake in Hallwood Realty Partners. He paid my investors $80 per share and agreed to what he called 'schmuck insurance.' The agreement provided that he would pay my investors an earnout equal to 50% of his profit on Hallwood after he received a 10% annual return if he 'sold or otherwise transferred' his shares for value within three years."

Ackman says Icahn reneged, proving the insurance really was for schmucks.

(Read More: Ackman, Icahn Showdown: Twitter Reaction.)

So I'm thinking of starting a company called Schmuck Insurance. If these two need it, we all need it. My suggested tagline, "Schmuck Insurance. All you need is a handshake."


Other suggested taglines from Twitter include:

"Schmuck Insurance: don't get caught short."

"So easy two billionaire cavemen can do it."

"Schmuck Insurance: we won't bully you."

"When you're tired of the Duck, try the Schmuck."

"We putz the client first."

Thanks for the suggestions from @tomkorocz, @j2lovesfriday, @WillowGroveJoe, and @szorowitz. Add yours in the comments section below.

—By CNBC's Jane Wells; Follow her on Twitter: @janewells