Your Money

Your date won't call you back because your money habits are terrible

Key Points
  • Forty-two percent of adults said a potential partner's credit score would affect their willingness to date him or her.
  • Close to four in ten believe a couple should know each other's credit scores after dating for a few months.
Photodjo | Getty Images

You can't put a price on love. Or can you?

More than four in 10 adults say knowing someone's credit score would affect their willingness to date him or her.

A recent survey from Bankrate.com, a personal finance website, showed that women were nearly three times as likely as men to view a poor credit score as a major consideration on whether they pursued a potential love interest. Indeed, 37 percent of the surveyed participants believe that a couple ought to know each other's credit scores after dating for a few months.

Bankrate interviewed 1,000 adults by phone in April.

While the results don't suggest you should pelt your date with questions about his or her credit before the main course arrives, said Mike Cetera, a credit card analyst at Bankrate, "you want to get to the heart of 'How do you manage your finances?'"

Here's how to sniff out your love interest's bad habits.

Spendthrift or penny pincher

Take a closer look at your suitor's spending patterns while you're out. "You'll see the purchases they make at a store, the types of dinners or beverages that they pay for," said Cetera.

Differences in spending habits tend to fuel fights once a relationship gets serious.

A 2016 survey from Chase found that the number one source of conflict among spouses who feud over money is splurging. "Not saving enough money" and "deciding on big expenses," were second and third, respectively.

Your date may only be splurging after budgeting for high-end dinners and trinkets. On the other hand, this could be indicative of excessive spending.

"If it isn't aligned with what you think is affordable for their station in life, then that can be a red flag," Cetera said.

Dodging the subject

Share your attitude about money during a date and make it part of the conversation. This way, you learn about each other's approach toward money.

"'I just paid my college loans off. Have you had loans?'" suggested Cetera. "You can talk about your own experiences."

More from Your Money, Your Future

The latest mortgage perk for millennials: Reward points

Six common myths that can wreck your retirement

Five steps to turn your child into a financial whiz

Proceed with caution if your date dodges the subject.

"I think the number one indication that there may be a problem is that you bring up a topic and your partner gets skittish right away," Cetera said. "They're hiding something or they're afraid you'll find something out about their finances."

Understand payment patterns

Of the Bankrate survey participants who were married or living with their partner, 77 percent said they have at least one joint account.

Keep an eye out for worrisome behavior that may emerge once you're living together and sharing your finances.

"Whether they pay bills on time or whether they move a credit card balance from one place to another to keep debt collectors at bay," said Cetera.

Once you and your partner become serious enough to discuss your joint finances, prepare for an open discussion of your credit card histories and more.

Consider these five steps to ensure that chat runs smoothly:

Go on a date — to talk about money: "A relaxing Sunday morning is a more ideal time to have a financial conversation than at the end of a long workday when you're lying in bed and exhausted," said Alexa von Tobel, founder and CEO of LearnVest.

Stay casual: Your "finance date" shouldn't be a formal affair. You can have your talk over a glass of wine and some takeout. Just make sure that you're having this chat in a quiet place.

Be prepared: Do your homework before you meet up. Bring your credit card and bank statements, student and car loan balances, or a copy of your credit score and relevant reports. "It's important to come to the conversation with full knowledge of your financial picture," said von Tobel.

Discuss combining accounts: Blending your finances with your squeeze might not be the best idea for you two—or it might be.

"If you love compromise, combining your finances may be a good fit," said von Tobel. "If you're fiercely independent, keeping your finances separate may be the way to go."

Keep your common goals in mind: Wrap up your "finance date" with a round-up of your shared goals, even if they're long term.