George Carlin, RIP: 7 Words You Can't Say on Financial TV

George Carlin
George Carlin

Comedian George Carlin died Sunday at the age of 71.

In tribute to him, and one of his greatest skits (Seven Dirty Words You Can't Say on Television -- WARNING! ADULT CONTENT), I'm giving you the seven words you can't say on financial television.

Definitions are from Campbell R. Harvey's Hypertexual Finance Glossary.

Long straddle

Taking a long position in both a put and a call option.

Horizontal merger

A merger involving two or more firms in the same industry.


A stock that grows in value ten-fold.

Crack Spread

The differential between the price of crude oil and petroleum products extracted from it.

Bulge bracket

A tier of firms in an underwriting syndicate that have the highest participation level.

Asset stripper

A corporate raider that takes over a target company in order to sell large assets to repay debt.

Back-end load fund

A mutual fund that charges investors a fee to sell shares.

Questions? Comments?