There Must Be A Pony In Here Somewhere

Feel Like a Million Bucks? Twitter Says You're Worth...


You may feel like a million bucks after striking that power deal. Someone may even tell you that you look like a million bucks after a couple weeks on that shake-for-lunch diet.

But here's the cold, hard reality, just in time for the holidays: You're really only worth about $2.50.

In terms of being a Twitter follower, that is.

No one really knew before what a Twitter follower was worth. But a memo from the sales department to prospective advertisers leaked out, revealing that the Cost Per Follower (CPF) for promoted accounts is anywhere from $2.50 to $4. Promoted accounts are the ones that Twitter suggests to users as accounts they may also want to follow. Something like — Hey, if you like your friend Jennifer’s Twitter Feed, you’re gonna love the Tweets from JCPenney!

$2.50. That's the same price you pay for getting into a New York City taxi — without going anywhere.

What else can you get for $2.50?

One pair of tighty whitey men’s underwear.

A box of Kleenex tissues. (The upright box — 68 sheets.)

And a quarter pound of Boar’s Head sweet sliced ham.

But hey, look. If you FEEL good, if you feel like a million bucks, that’s what counts, right? Let’s just go back to that.

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